Every single pair of pants that I’ve ever bought in Asia, the stitching has gone in between the legs. Gone at the crutch as my Grandma would have said. Every. Single. Pair. Either somebody is playing a cruel joke on me here, or my bum cheeks are gradually inflating by the day.
The only positive to this Thai haberdashery error is that there’s always a gentle cool breeze wafting through my knickers. To calm me down. An onsite fan to cool the hot flushes that accompany a woman of my age who is prone to bouts of frantic rage.
Welcome to the Travel Bog Diaries.
Brian announces that we are to rent some bikes and go to explore the city of Chiang Mai.
Chaing Mai is supposedly cooler than Bangkok, but my built-in sweat thermometer is telling me differently. Either that or Tessa’s Dove stick deodorant – the one that she hides in her sleeping bag because she doesn’t want me to use it, is out of date.
It’s too hot to wear a bra in Thailand.
Still, I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to go for a bike ride braless.
What if I accidentally pinched my dangling nipple while pulling on the brakes?
No.
Too risky. Too painful.
That’s all I need, me, swerving into the oncoming traffic. Laying hobbled on the road. My poor children having to come and identify me. Tessa, having to admit that, yes, that is indeed my mother. And Oh. My. God. How embarrassing. She is clutching her nipple…
Oh Lizzie……you did it again princess! Only you could make me laugh at 4am in the morning ( bloody cats woke me up, Pandora got stuck in the catflap, must put her on a diet!) Love it, sooo much, it’s as if you are here… telling me. Brilliant!!xxx
Thank you. You are, and always will be, my reason for writing xxx
You are so witty Lizzie… absolutely love reading these … xxx
And I love your comments Miss Wade xx
Oh my….you are too funny!!!! Just perfect!!!
Oh, thank you lovely lady! I look back at the photos of us in America and we all look so…So …Clean!xx
Another hilarious chapter in your wonderful blog Lizzie!!! Keep up the awesome work girlfriend!!! xx
Thank you, my friend! Love to know my only male reader is enjoying it! xx
Oh that is bloody brilliant, Liz! Haha.
The teen boy/bike incident…that would be me. Although I’m imagining Thailand traffic 25 years ago and I’m thinking -you are so brave! If I remember correctly it’s crazy mad although I never went to Chiang Mai…..
I have always wanted to go back to Thailand and I will, one day. The people, the scenery, the 100 foot Buddha that appear in the landscape…loved it.I also want to go to Vietnam and think you are there now so I shall read on……
Thank you so much for your comment and support Sophie. Every day I wake up and say to myself “today I will not be an old bag…’ and then when I go to bed I think “well. I wasn’t THAT bad…’
I know you understand this!! xx