Another classic accusation from the teenage son yesterday.
“You think you’re so cool. But you’re just not“.
AAAggrrrrrrrr. And… Breathe.
E-V-E-R-S.
( Ok, so he might have a point).
Here’s the thing. I have never, in my life professed to being ‘cool‘. It’s just not what I’m about. Not in my vocabulary.
Yes. Admittedly, there was that time when I went to the Wham concert and screamed to George that I loved him, but that was only because I’d seen people do it on the telly and thought that’s how you behaved at a concert. I was only 12. And anyway, let’s face it, George was and always will be a God. I should have proudly owned that pubescent outburst- but I was 12. So I didn’t. Not cool.
Even at the age that I should have been cool, I was not. My goth friend was cool. She didn’t give a shit and wore her Grandad’s scruffy coat and everything, but me? I just stood beside her saying stuff like, “Yeah, I like the Cure too.”
When really, I adored Rick Astley. If I wasn’t cool at 16, I’m damn sure I’m not going to manage it now.
Not being able to let it rest, and dying to know which of his friend’s Mother he’d met that was obviously letting the side down, I pressed on.
” How many 46-year-olds do you know that are cool?” My hip sticking out and pretending to chew gum.
Mr, too cool for school (literally) looks at the hips, shakes his head in disbelief and says:
“Just because you’re old and in your 40’s, you can still be cool…”
Errmm. Let me think?
No.
Sorry.
Still thinking…
I try and recall the people with whom I associate the term ‘cool’
Well… There was The Fonz. He was cool. Sort of. In a way that only a 30-year-old man who likes hanging out at ice cream parlours can be.
Rizzo from Grease. She was cool. Bad, beautiful, dangerous and yes. Cool.
Uma Thurman, Pulp Fiction. Very, very, Cool.
BUT GUESS WHAT CLEVER CLOGGS?
Haven’t you spotted the c-o-n-n-e-c-t-i-o-n yet?
Durrr…
They were all CHILDLESS. Yep. Carefree. Single. Solitary. Unaccompanied. Sans enfants.
Cool.
Did you ever hear a little voice behind Fonzie saying,” Can I have a lick of your ice cream Daddy?” No.
Or when Kenickie was reaching for the broken condom, I didn’t see Riz whip out the phone and say” I’ll just quickly text the kids and let them know I’ll be late.”
And, correct me if I’m wrong here, but I don’t recall Uma sauntering onto the dance floor with Johnny boy, only to announce: “my daughter learnt these moves for her dance exam in term 3, she got a merit, we’re so proud of her”
I rest my case. How can a parent EVER be considered cool? It’s i-m-p-o-s-s-i-b-l-e.
I may not be cool. BUT dear boy, when you become a parent, there are other traits that you long to be able to brag about, and after 16 years of Motherhood, I reckon I’ve earned a few.
15 Qualities That Beat Being Cool When You’re in Your 40’s.
- I homeschool you and your sister. That takes the Patience of a saint.
- I gave birth to you. Your head was massive. Bravery.
- I sometimes let you think that you know more than me. Consideration.
- I congratulate you on getting 1000 subscribers on your YouTube channel, even though I’m secretly wondering if you bought them illegally. Supportive.
- I say nothing when you sing at the top of your voice in the bathroom to hide the fact that you’re playing games on your phone. Tactful.
- I don’t look at your messages when your FaceBook account has been accidentally left open. Trustworthy.
- Sometimes though, I might look at the beginnings of the messages on your home screen when your phone is left on the counter. Honesty.
- I hid that pretend spider in your bed that time and wet myself watching you scream your head off. Humour.
- I dragged you 12,000 miles across the world when you were 8 years old so that you could experience living in a different country, even though people said we were wrong. Determination.
- I let you leave high school after 12 weeks so that you could return to learning at home. Dependability.
- I answer your bizarre questions about the world (“how long do you think it would take for a deaf, dumb and blindness epidemic to reach New Zealand”) at 11 pm, when I’m knackered and quite frankly could do with some sleep. Communication.
- I love you so much it makes my heart ache. I mean I really love you. Even though you won’t let me listen to your Skype calls and you turn off the ‘find my friends’ feature on your phone when you’re in town, so I can’t locate you… I still, and always will, really Love you.
- I’m considering taking you backpacking around the world for a year, even though it will mean spending our life savings and my funeral fund. Generous.
So there you have it.
We parents don’t want to be cool (granted, some of us don’t have a choice in the matter.) We don’t need to be. We have too many other brilliant labels that we are flaunting.
We will leave the coolness to you.
To you and to John Travolta.
He has kids.
And he has a helicopter.
That’s so cool…
Just what I needed!!! Loved it, and you are the coolest girl I know. Xxxx
Ahhhh thank you xxxx
Oh, you are definitely cool. Brilliant post.
#BloggerclubUK
Aww thank you Suzanne! Thanks for reading x
Haha great post!! To write like this you must be pretty cool!! you’re cool in the “blogging world” anyway
#ablogginggoodtime
Awww… thank you!x
haha … love this. I’ve always been the side-kick too not the cool one.
#bloggerclubuk
It’s not fair is it!! Thanks for reading x
I’ve nominated you for the Blogger Recognition Award. Have a great cool weekend.
Oh you’re an absolute darling!! Thank you so much. What an honour and one that was timed perfectly! I was having one of those “what’s the point? It takes too much time for nothing” days… you must have heard me! I can’t tell you how much this means to me?have a lovely weekend my friend x
We all have those days. I’m so glad I could make it feel just a bit better. x
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One cool mother here! Get it girl 😉
#bloggerclubuk
Thanks for reading! X
Loved this!!!!!! I hear your 40’s are your best decade if you’re a woman!! #fridayfrolics
They are!!thanks for reading 🙂
Love this post, and Rizzo was totallty the coolest – who the heck wanted to be Sandy?! #FridayFrolics
I know!!! Skipping around with her yellow headband on… no thanks!! Thanks for reading x
Awesome post! You are cool because you went to that Wham concert! Blimey. I was there with you but it was all about Andrew. ((Sigh)) My teens think I’m the oldest woman in the world (I’m 45) apart from Gran who’s ancient. But what is cool? You rock as a mum! #fridayfrolics
Ahhh lovely, a young whipper snapper ( I’m 46!) I know… I tried to show them the ‘last Christmas’ video, but they just laughed their heads off and said I must have been weird …?I took that as a compliment actually… doesn’t weird mean ‘cool’?? Thanks for reading x
He does have the world’s worst weave though. (John T that is). This did make me laugh. We’ve told the Tubblet that being embarrassing is part of the job description so she can just deal.
Bad weave or not … I love him!! I can handle not being cool but being an embarrassment… it just cuts to hard…?thanks for reading Tubbs!
Yeah! I’d rather be a good mom than a cool mom! I love how you wrote this! Honesty, Determination, Communication…YES! YES! YES!
#FridayFrolics
That’s right! Me too! Thank you for reading x
Yep, we are not cool because we are Mums. As soon as we birth a little one our coolness leaves us but instead we become awesome human beings like your list has demonstrated! We are a level above cool 😉 #FridayFrolics
Thank you for understanding!
I’ve met some of the moms that our teenager thinks are cool . I think they are scumbags #bloggingggodtime
Ha!Ha!Ha! Classic ?
Oh, you are the coolest of them all, for coming up with this post! #ablogginggoodtime <3
Thank you Lisa and thanks so much for reading!
How funny! I have no idea what my teenagers or their friends for that matter think of me but I am sure cool is not there anywhere – funny, maybe and strict for sure! It’s tough this parenting malarkey and at 50 cool is probably never an option. #ablogginggoodtime
At least your teenagers don’t tell you outright that you’re not cool ( maybe this is a sign that you are!)
Thanks for reading!
This is so funny! I’m so jealous that you got to go to a Wham concert, but I did scream my undying love at Jon Bon Jovi – that’s cool right?! (I can feel my kids rolling their eyes at me ha ha) #TheListLinky
That is so, so cool madam!! Jon Bon Jovi.. definitely cool ?!
Popping back from #TweensTeensBeyond – I am still to ask them the question! x
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I think us lot are all pretty cool! My daughter on the other hand would disagree! The ‘cool mum’ tag is reserved for those in their 20’s and 30’s in our playground. I did mention that they were my friends and that must mean something? Apparently not! The kids can sniff them out from a very early age! One lad in my daughters class asked her if she was embarrassed that her dad was so old!! That was a tough day for him! My husband not the class mate! It’s helped whittle down potential future suitors though. Turns out his grandad was younger at 47! Can’t compete with that can we. Thanks for joining us at #tweensteensbeyond. The place where you can be as cool as you like!
Thank you Nicola! Imagine being a grandad at 47, now that’s bound to be cool and get you some cred…As long as you do the right things of course. Don’t do what my grandad did when he was in his 50s, he dyed his hair purple and thought it was hilarious to pick me up from school singing in his Glaswegian accent at the top of his voice. At the time, being 10 or so, it was very not cool. Now, were he still alive, he would be the coolest man I know!! Funny thing that…! Thanks for reading x
I haven’t heard the “you’re not cool” statement yet but I do hear on a regular basis from my 10 year old that I’m too old to have any more children. I’ll be 40 next month. The little bugger! Ironically, my 15 year old actually stands up for me when his little brother says that. Weird. By the way, your humor is way cooler than mine so you’re cool in my book! Popping over from #bloggerclubuk
Ha! Ha! Don’t they know that we are never too old for ANYTHING??? Today mind you, I feel too old to wring the dish cloth out let alone have another baby…nice to meet you! Thanks for reading and for your lovely comment x
Love this even more the second time round – John Travolta and the Fonz – they were so mighty cool weren’t they?! Very funny #BloggerClubUK
Thank you my lovely ?I can’t believe I put the same post up again ?It was late at night and I couldn’t remember if I’d put it on or not so I just sent it… poor hosts! I appreciate your gracious comment! x
Lol! Hilarious! And for the record, I think you deserve a medal for not reading those Facebook messages. I couldn’t possibly resist!
I know… sometimes I’m like..” ohhh just a little peak…” Ha! Ha!
Thanks so much for reading!
Liz x
Absolutely brilliant, so that’s why I’m not cool, I don’t have a helicopter! I love the list at the end of what a parent is. These things matter a lot more than being cool! Thanks so much for joining us at #TweensTeensBeyond
Imagine that… picking up from school in a helicopter!! How cool! ?
Until then…back to the dishes.
Thanks so much for reading!
X
Aww this is such a lovely post – we’re definitely cool!I love the bit about how much our hearts ache as we love them so much…so true. Thanks for linking up to #dreamteam x
Having just turned 46 and spent the evening getting drunk until 2am at Soho House I consider myself living proof that you can be old and cool. I don’t know how I’d cope with a teenage son however as mine are 3 and 1 and I can be cool by doing a helicopter noise with my mouth or playing the theme from Paw Patrol on the guitar (it’s not hard). Being an older dad i hope i wont have to worry about being cool when my boys are teens as i’ll be 60+ so there is no way they will want to go to a gig with me or anywhere in fact. You are so cool by the way. They just dont know it yet.
#blogcrush
Bloody hell… 2am??? Don’t tell me you weren’t secretly wishing for your a taxi and a takeaway cup of tea? Oh well, if not it gives me hope, I’m 46 too and if the clock strikes 11am I automatically fall asleep! Thanks so much for reading, you sound cool too! ?
Massive one off. Got carried away and ended up in night bus hell with the teenagers. Never again.
This post is BRILLIANT! I can definitely pass at being “cool” if I can claim these other attributes (even though I will always secretly want to be cool anyway!) #blogcrush
I love this post, cool is overrated! #BlogCrush
Thank you! I agree x
Popped back from #Blogcrush. Great post Liz! This happens in our house…I am the least cool person ever
I don’t believe that for a minute! X
You sure are a cool mum #blogcrush
Aww thank you! I’ll print this out and stick it to my boys door! Thanks so much for reading!
Being Cool is over rated, I love your other qualities, they are so much better.
#blogcrush
Thankyou! Us mums have lots of hidden talents don’t we?! Thanks so much for reading! X
Actually, you are as cool as I am because you have all the same movie references in your repertoire. Obviously another child of the 70’s/80’s. We’re the coolest! #blogcrush
Yay! And don’t let anyone tell US that the 80s weren’t cool…! ?
It is SUPER cool to be indoor 40’s! The fact that you don’t have to care what people think anymore (if you ever did) is the very definition of cool!
#blogcrush
Isn’t that right? I can feel myself edging towards that old women who shows her knickers at weddings and then gives everyone the finger as she walks out!! Oh no…??
I’m looking down the barrel of 40 – sounds like I’ll be in great company. #blogcrush
Welcome to the decade of freedom!! (And wrinkles)??
oh my gosh this had me in giggles, I like to think i am pretty cool, but the fact is I don’t think my 13 year old will agree, I think my 7 year old still thinks his mu is cool though (either that or he is good at faking it). Brilliant read! #blogcrush
Thank you! Oh, the love of a 7 year old! They’re just gorgeous at that age aren’t they? ?
I love this post! I’m 26 and probably if I didn’t have 2 kids I might be in some way ‘cool’. I’m definitely not cool though, at all and I am totally OK with that. Like you said, as parents we are so much more than cool and that’s totally fine. Thanks for the laughs, loved his post xx #blogcrush
Thank you Wendy! 26! I bet you’re super cool ? it’s funny how we lose the desire to be ‘cool’ (sort of!) and wear the hat of other great roles. You realise with two kids at 26 you’re already super cool! Thanks for your lovely comment, liz xx