I had my first child when I was 30. He started school when I was 34. You think you know it all at 30, but of course, this isn’t true. Nor at 40, and probably not 50, 60, 70 or 80 either. I suppose life would be boring if we knew it all. Sort of.
But. There are things that I do know now, things that had I known then would have made my life a damn sight easier. Or maybe just my conscience clearer.
Starting School.
Those hideous first few days when your child is about to start school. Feeling as though they’re abandoning you. This little person who has been my right-hand man for 4 or 5 years is now off to school. Wearing his new shoes and uniform and looking all grown up.
It’s Tuesday! We always go to our big food shop together on Tuesday and then for a fluffy afterwards…Yes, I know I swore I’d never take you back there again after you kicked over the chair and broke one of the spindles, but it’s our place. Our routine.
The First day of school. Trying your hardest to be cheerful. Upbeat. ‘It’s going to be soo exciting.’ And then the dreaded question. “Will you stay with me, Mummy?”
Up the path to the classroom. All the while chattering on incessantly about how “those gates are a nice colour blue, aren’t they?” and “I wonder if that tree always has those pretty flowers?”
His hand starting to grip a little bit tighter now.
Why couldn’t I have been more like that new entrant Mother? You know the one I mean? Always there, smiling, confident, breezing in as though she’s done it a million times before. Her child biting at the bit to get into the classroom, to show the new teacher a picture that he’d drawn in the summer holidays.
But no. There’s You. Still trying to figure out where your child is supposed to hang his coat up. “Oh look! Your peg is next to Laura’s. That’s a nice name. I bet she’s a lovely little girl” blabbering nervously away.
Please let her be a lovely little girl. You want to go to the teacher, take her to one side and say “can I just let you know…he’s a really sensitive little boy” but she’s already swarmed with all of the other pushys and you don’t want to be one of those.
I wish I’d known this.
That your baby will always be yours. No matter how many hours a day they’re away from you at school, they will still be your number one and you theirs. You’ve done the groundwork. They’ll love you and miss you immensely. It’s just their new adventure.
Homework. Those first few years of school. My son was so little. I look back at the photos and literally, he was a baby.
Why then, when he’d been at school for 6 hours already and was thoroughly exhausted, did I make him sit in a car park- waiting for his swimming lessons to start and force that tired little boy to read the assigned book that had been given to him for homework?
There was an alternative woman who had a child in the same class as my son.
You can read more about her here.
She had quite an effect on me. I watched her float into school one morning with a letter for the headmaster stating that under no circumstances was her child to be given homework. He wouldn’t be doing it she said. Not ever.
At the time, I was too busy trying to keep in with the in-crowd and so outwardly scoffed at her hippy ideas. Deep down though, I knew that she was right. I wish I’d said the same thing. Wish I’d been brave enough to stand out from the crowd like her.
But I wasn’t. Not then.
All of those wasted hours spent doing extra work with a tiny child who was already exhausted were the most unproductive, unnecessary and needless to say the most stressful waste of hours of mine and his life.
Being told he was slow in maths.
How many nights did I spend crying and worrying myself sick after being told that my 6-year-old was not up to standard with his numeracy?
His teacher advised me that on our summer holiday to France, I should spend an hour a day with my ‘slow’ child asking him to add up the numbers on the car number plates.
And you know what? This silly cow did it.
There were tears every day on that holiday. Both from him and from me, but mostly from me. The poor boy dreaded it if a car drove past.
Yet regardless of my efforts, every time those annoying little stat test papers came back, they would bring with them that familiar ache of dread in the pit of my stomach. There it was glaring out at me. Numeracy. Still shit. Below average. Not good enough.
I wish I’d known that this would happen.
That at 15 years old, my son (who has been homeschooled since the age of ten – you see, I told you that I grew up and found my voice) would pass his maths exam that he took a year early.
He wanted to get it out of the way as he hated maths. He passed his algebra exam and now has the required maths achievements should he want to go to university. (You can read about my thoughts on that though, here.) All of that worrying. All of those tears. What a waste.
Please.
If you are told that your child is ‘slow’ in anything, get the teacher to put it in writing then rip the piece of paper up and flush it down the toilet. When your child is ready, they will learn. I promise.
I promise.
Bullying.
It’s every parent dread, isn’t it? Here’s your baby going happily along, believing that everyone in the world resembles the characters from children’s TV, and then it hits them. They come to learn that there are mean kids out there. Of course, there are. There are also mean adults out there too. Mean parents. But we are bigger and stronger, and we have cars that we can go and sit in and hide. Mascara that we can slap on to cover up the tears.
My son started to be bullied after about a year at school. And this was supposedly a ‘nice’ school. They had the buddy system with the older kids. Plastered all over the walls were the posters about being kind and respectful, all of those things that bullies don’t give a shit about.
Back then, stupidly, I dealt with it the PC way. The way that every school asks you to deal with it. The way that won’t bring attention to the precious school and maybe affect their stats.
I went to the headmaster who said he would speak sternly to the boy in question. My boy continued to be bullied. I went back.
This time the same man insisted he would have the child in question write a letter to my son, apologising for scratching his back. My boy continued to be bullied. All the while, while I’m faffing around backwards and forwards with a teacher who is more concerned with his school’s stats, my son is becoming increasingly terrified of going to school.
Unfortunately, if your child is in the least bit different, stands out from the crowd, doesn’t fit neatly into the box, there’s a fair chance that some bullying will come their way during the school years.I’m sorry but its highly likely. My son is an actor, he sings at any given opportunity. He doesn’t like rugby. He used to wear coloured contacts so people would think he was a vampire (I know, don’t.)
I wish I’d known back then just to kick up the most almighty fuss imaginable. Fight for him. I know that people say that by doing this you make it worse for the child but believe me, that’s crap. His life at school was hell anyway. It couldn’t have been any worse. I wish I’d fought his corner so hard so that he knew that no matter what, his mum would never stop fighting for him.
Friends.Yours, not theirs.
Standing outside the school gates and making gossipy chit chat with a load of women whom you normally wouldn’t ask the time of day from. They were the times that when I think of them now, send shivers down my spine.
You try so hard. You want to be accepted. Be part of the mummy club. But what is it with these parents? Why the hell is it, that all they want to do is mouth off about how their child can recite her nine times tables while playing the flute, or brag about how their little Johnny is going to skip an academic year next year because he is soo intelligent.
You. Wanting the playground to open up and swallow you. Even considering going over to the caretaker and asking him if he needs some help sweeping up the leaves. Anything to get away from this bunch of seagulls.
What you long for is a friend. A real friend. You want to talk about how much wine you needed to get through last week or how your jeans are too tight as a result of it. But unless you are really, really lucky you won’t find that friend hovering at the school gate. You have to look in the car park. She’s there look! Sitting in her car pretending to read something important on her phone. Secretly waiting for 10 seconds before the bell rings so that she can rush over, grab her child and make her getaway.
I wish I’d looked for her straight away. I found her eventually, but it took me 4 years. She too, rushed into the classroom late, flustered. I knew then that I’d found my partner in crime (Hi Anjie). 4 Years. 4 Years wasted on dead end acquaintances. Pushy parents whose goal in life is to make other parents feel inadequate.
There are many more ‘wish I’d known then what I know now’s’ but I think this post is long enough. Anyway, it’s 10 am, and the grass needs cutting. It’s forecast to rain at midday.
Maybe, when I’m 70 I’ll say “I wish I’d known to get a ride on mower.”
I’d love to hear of your wish I’d knowns. Jot some down in the comment box below. Let me know your wisdom. Right. To the grass.
I wish I had realised when I was 45 just how wonderful the next 20 years were going to be.! X
Xxx
I wish that in my 20s that I hadn’t wasted it being obsessed with thinking that I wasn’t good enough and always trying to lose weight because I was convinced my life would be better if I was a size 8. Urgh. #FridayFrolics
Yes… that’s one all our girls need to read! X
Sorry the school couldn’t stop the bullying. That’s sad and disappointing. I’ll heed your warnings. #FridayFrolics
I suppose there’s only so much they can do. I just wish I’d done more! Thanks so much for reading! X
Great post. My boy is also a bit different, he loves theatre and dressing up and I worry continually about him going off to secondary school. I just wish Id appreciated how quickly everything goes – I wish Id had ore time to enjoy the special moments instead of hurrying things on but that’s the joy of hindsight for you! #stayclassymama
Thank you:) I wouldn’t worry too much about secondary school, it seems that when your different at ages 15/16 it’s then cool! Yay! Me too… I wish I’d enjoyed those moments instead of worrying about the next stage. Thanks so much for reading! X
Thank you ? this Is such a great post. I get a lot of your advice even though my kids are younger I think having a special needs child lead me to some of these conclusions earlier than others and as a teacher I HATE homework! Thank you for linking up to #ablogginggoodtime ?
Me too!! Thank you for reading my lovely x
This is so beautiful. My seven year old really struggles with maths. Yet He’s nearly two years ahead with his reading and writing. I just figure we can’t all be brilliant at everything! I agree with you on the homework. Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics
Hard lesson to learn but also I think sometimes it is instinctive, survival of the fittest and all that X #ablogginggoodtime
True… x
I think it’s alright. You can’t go back now and redo things. No one is perfect. You realised your mistakes and regret it. I think that’s good enough. Your child won’t love you any less. And it’s a great thing that you’re out and opening up to others about it. This way, you’re helping others too. And that’s a great thing 😀 Important thing is, you don’t repeat the mistake. And I suppose that’s done!
This is pretty damn awesome! I am with you on that ride mower 😉
#bigpinklink
Thank you! X
Oh there is so much to love about this post! Oh to know then what we do now. So interesting to reflect on whether we would have done things differently. We invariably would which will help other mums realise that there is no right way – we are all winging it! I love your story about finding a true friend and that she’s sat in the car. Love this! The playground mums can be dire and I too hate the competition – it’s so so ugly and one of the worst characteristics of school life sadly. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this post! #BigPinkLink
Thank you so much for such a lovely comment! I appreciate that x
So much wisdom here. The bullying thing made me angry though. The Tubblet got picked on and we gave them a chance to deal with it. After a bit of push-back, they stepped up. They spoke to the girls, spoke the parents and it stopped. (Not sure what they said to the parents, but one of them still won’t meet my eye when I say hello to her. I’m really not bothered. Her child did it, not her. They were spoken too. It stopped. No need to be embarrassed. These things happen). There’s got to be something wrong when someone in that job is more concerned about stats than people. I’m sorry this happened to you
Thank you Tubbs. Maybe I should have just pushed more… either way, it’s happened now. I’m glad Tubblet got it sorted. I’m not sure what I’d do if my child was accused of bullying another. I suppose no parent wants to believe their kids are capable of it. I certainly wouldn’t take it out in the other parent though… when will people realise we are all in this together?! Thanks so much for reading! X
I wish I’m known in my 20’s that I wasn’t always going to be a pretty much constantly drunk waster haha! I’m actually serious, but I definitely enjoyed it and it would’ve been nice to have known that it was going to turn out ok. I loved turning 30, I left a lot of worries and insecurities behind. Also, having a son with special needs has hugely helped me get rid of the negative and pointless parts of my life, we try our best to focus on the positives. Most of the time it works. Lovely post x x
Oops #bigpinklink 🙂
Oh,thats brilliant Hayley! Its true isnt it? If someone could say it’s all going to be ok, how much easier it would be?! I’m so glad your son has brought lots of positivity to your life:) Thanks so much for reading! x
I wish I had known to cherish my 20s and take a nap more often! #bigpinklink
Hahaha! I think I might start that advice now!
This is such a powerful post. The bullying one…I’ve just come to that realisation myself and wish I could rewind four years and kick up an absolute shit storm. Maybe the bullying would have continued regardless, but at least I’d have shown my son that I would fight for him.
I nodded at a lot of the others too, and am tempted to print this off and stick it on my fridge to guide me as I raise my youngest two.
#BigPinkLink
Oh, thank you Sadie and I’m sorry to hear that you had to go through the bullying thing. It’s traumatic isn’t it…you just do what you think is best at the time but when you look back you could kick yourself. Hindsight is a wonderful thing hey? Let me know how it’s all going with the younger two and thanks so much for your comment. Liz x
Thanks for sharing this – these are really useful things to bear in mind during the school years. We’re only a year in so some of these will be helpful to know along the way. #twinklytuesday
I wish I’d known that all my worrying about my son making the team, that all the help we gave him with extra lessons and strength conditioning, would pay off. Right now it isn’t as he’s deemed not good enough. And all the other parents are smug or downright conceited about their kid who did make the team. UGH!
#tweensteensbeyond
Yay! How fantastic is it when something pays off! Well done to both you and your son and thanks for the comment, liz x
Ok…So, I had the same experience with the Mommy Cliques! (Only for around 6-7 years) We live in a small town & since I am not originally from here I was an outsider from the get go. I probably didn’t do myself any favors socially when I didn’t stand around in the school line & gossip before pick up, but I’m not all that into talking shiz about people and I’m not an a@@ kisser!
I AM a worry wart. I have worried myself sick over the dumbest things…try-outs, science fairs, book reports, etc. I do wish I had that time back. That is the definition of sweating the small stuff.
And you know what? If a teacher had recommended that I count license plates with my son on vacay, I would have counted them too!!!
I hate that your child was bullied, but I’m not surprised that the school’s posters didn’t turn the kid’s attitudes around. That stuff begins at home and like the saying goes, “hurt people hurt people.” If the kids are being bullied or treated unkindly at home, of course they are going to take it out on other kids at school. It doesn’t make it right- just makes it understandable. At least that’s how it was explained to me when my 9 year old was bullied this year…in the THIRD GRADE!!!
Ok, so I’ve written a blog post! Better run. Great job on YOUR post! #TheListLinky
Oh, thank you so much for your ‘post’ back to me! (Can I change it around a bit and publish it??!) Yes. The bullying thing does come from home I think, and to be honest I really can’t see a way of solving the problem. ‘Shower them with love’ we have always said in our family, but it’s hard to remember that sometimes! I wish I’d been in your town, we could have hung out in the car together! Thanks so much for reading! Liz x
Having become a dad much later than many at 30 I wasn’t even considering if I wanted kids. So in my mid 40s and with two pre-schoolers I guess I wish I’d known that i could hack it and that having children really does changed my life for the better, so I shouldnt have worried. Good to read your line about them always being yours as school scares me! #twinklytuesday
My husband was 41 when we had our first (Im biased but I think ‘mature’ men make for more patient dads!?) They do change your life for the better don’t they? Would love to know your adventures of school and don’t worry about the small stuff!! Thanks so much for reading! Liz
Oh, Liz! This is so fantastic! I wish you lived closer so that I could bring you a bottle of wine and tell you all about this crap that I’ve dealt with that is almost exactly the same as yours!!!! Where to start? HOMEWORK!! Ugh! How I hate homework! With my oldest, I forced her to power through, every single day, at FIVE YEARS OLD, even though she was exhausted, had AD/HD (which I didn’t know yet) and couldn’t possibly concentrate on any of that crap after spending 6 hours at school. It took forever, and she was always so stressed out. I hate that I put her through that. And for what? At the time, homework was 5% of her grade, and since she had homework 4 days a week, each homework assignment ended up being worth some minuscule portion of grades that don’t even matter! She was in kindergarten! So she’d spend an hour crying and stressing over an assignment that in the grand scheme of things would end up being 0.001% of an “In Progress” or something. Why did I do it?! By the time my 3rd child got to Kindergarten, I decided it wasn’t happening anymore. Every day, I asked him if he wanted to do his homework, and every day, he said “No.” So I said, “OK, go play.” He got zeroes on all his homework assignments, and you know how much difference that made for him? NONE! I wish I had thought of this years ago!
I could go on and on. The other moms, the bullying. Yes, we’ve dealt with that too. Thanks for your words of wisdom! Now I need you to tell me what you wish you’d known when your kids were 8 and 9, because that’s where my girls are! #twinklytuesday
Where do you live?? I’m booking a ticket! ?yes. I think the homework thing is the one that sticks in my throats out of all of them..I bet every parent does it though (except for the hippie chick) I know it’s a cliche but I think the real answer to ANY age is just don’t sweat the small stuff. Trouble is, how do we know if it’s a small or a big one???! Back to the wine… liz x
Yes, it’s so hard to recognize the small stuff! It’s good to talk to parents with older kids to get some perspective! If you’re ever in Maryland, let me know. We’ll have a couple bottles.
As a mummy to young children, this post gives me hope. I have been a mummy for 6 years and I have only just made a “proper” mummy friend. It’s been a long time in coming but I appreciate it all the more #dreamteam
Oh Lucy, isn’t it just fabulous when you meet her… just to sit and talk about ‘real’ stuff. And it will only become stronger as your children get older. So glad for you! Liz x
Ahhh! I love this. Your first couple of comments really resonates with me because my youngest is off to school in September and I feel like crying every time I think about how much I’m going to miss my little side-kick and our regular trips to the shops and for coffee etc. So it’s good to know what you say about them always being yours. The bit about bullying was upsetting. – you put your trust in the school to do something so I can see how you would change things and fight. I’ll bear that in mind! I worry about stuff a lot, so I guess, this would be the thing I, as a 40 something year old would tell my younger self – to chill out and stop worrying quite so much! #BigPinkLink x
You know what Cheryl? Don’t worry about it. It probably will never happen, honestly,none of my other friends kids were ever bullied, they absolutely loved Primary school ? just be prepared for lots of tired cuddles and we all love those don’t we! Yes… I’m a worrier too, but looking back, all the things I worried about (and continue to do so) never actually happen. Let’s make a pact. Put it in a scale of 1 to 10 and if it’s not over a 8 don’t bother! Thanks so much for reading! Liz x
Aww – my eldest starts school in September, so we’ll see how that goes! I am currently leaning strongly towards the thinking that my kids will not do homework while little, as I think it’s ridiculous. But I may change my mind in the interests of not making them stand out. Thanks so much for joining us for #FridayFrolics
Big exciting changes ahead! Some kids love doing the homework, I suppose it depends on the child but yes I agree, little kids are just too tired. Good luck with September look forward to hearing about it through your posts! Liz x
What do i wish I’d known at the time? Hmm, a tricky question but I think I’d give a similar answer – that all of those things that seemed such huge problems weren’t after all #tweensteensbeyond
So sorry your son was bullied. It’s such a horrid thing to go though. My son is about to start primary school and I’m absolutely dreading it because he is such a sensitive boy and he always wants to please everyone. I just feel like he would be an easy target for bullies and worry that he will be indeed bullied. I know my fear maybe irrational but I truly am worries. Thank you for linking up this great post with #StayClassyMama
I’m sure he will be fine.mostly, the things we worry about never happen do they? If he does come across a Bully you will be onto it straight away. More children don’t get bullied than those who do, so please don’t worry.
Liz x
Its funny because my oldest is into the theater stuff and everything and he’s Autistic yet he’s never been bullied. My youngest is a lot more outgoing and every year there seems to be a new bully and I always have to resort to making threats to the school in order to get anything done. And even then only so much gets done. I recently wrote a post about the latest bully and how that went down. The schools here also preach about how they are a bully free zone and zero tolerance and all that but when it comes down to it, they hesitate to do anything. It’s disgusting! #bloggerclubuk
That just goes to show then, doesn’t it? I’m sorry to hear about your youngest but I’m glad you were more forceful than me in getting it resolved. Liz x
I was that hippy mum who said no to homework, the same mum who cried and felt like I’d failed my boy when they told me his was behind in almost all subjects, the one who avoided the playground clicks because it reminded me of the horrors of school and being left out despite my best efforts to fit in, I was also the one who kicked off at the first sign of bullies only for them to be best friends the next week. We are mums, we are learning and unfortunately we won’t always get things right all the time, but most the time we do and all the time we are doing what we think is best, sounds like you are doing a grand job to me xx
ahhh, thanks Stefani, that’s a lovely comment. Thank you for reading! Liz x
Such a great read. So as I’m 36 and with a child only starting school life I think I have a lot of wish I’d knowns coming to me but mine are mainly to do with the baby years…mainly I wish I’d known that I didn’t have to drive myself crazy to breastfeed my girl, or that I wasn’t just going to be able to ping out a baby and go back to the helm of my start up after three months and everything go swimmingly – ha! Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub with this xoxo
Oh, you are so right…Those baby years when we could have just spent the days snuggling up and just’ being’. It’s a great reminder to just enjoy the moment and stop worrying so much isn’t it? Thanks so much for reading x
Every time you hit publish is an absolute treat for the rest of us. 9 years at the school and frankly, I never found my friend despite knowing many. Now I’ve found her, the one who understands how hard school can be and who knows what my eldest is going through, but sadly for me she lives in New Zealand. Great blogger she is. (And mother which I’m sure her son knows). I fought back tears all the way through this #FridayFrolics xxxx
Ahh Prabs… what a gorgeous comment and a huge compliment for me when YOU are MY blogging hero…Thank you. I know?! I bet you are there by those gates but even with my super dooper telescope it won’t reach from New Zealand to Malta! How has this happened?? I hope things are getting easier with your big girl. I love it when I look at my wordpress stat map and little Malta comes up highlighted! Sending you lots of love my friend, liz xxx
Yes agree with this post! I have a 17 yr old and a 4 yr old so I am doing the whole school playground thing second time round and I get that whole ‘mummy parade’ thing. This time round I am much more chilled about it all and I dont care whether I am in the ‘cool mum’ crowd. I rush in and I rush out just how I like it. All the parties too!! Another chore to have to join in with, we do it for our children but they become a bit of a ‘who’s in the IT crowd’ – the last party I had to chaperone my 4yr old to they suggested the adults getting on the bouncy castle too!!! I had to laugh because without having my ‘tenna ladies’ on there is no way my pelvic floor can withstand any sort of jumping! xx #bigpinklink
Hahaha! I need those tenna ladies right now! Thanks so much for reading! X
Great article. As an ex teacher I totally agree with the no homework. I am determined to be that parent marching into the headteachers office.
I wish I’d had you to stand by my side! Thanks so much for reading (and as a side note, I think teachers deserve an absolute medal, I really do!) liz x
Now ex teacher as 12 years has put me off education…seriously considering home schooling
#bloggerclubuk …oops
I’d like to look back and regret the things I have done than those I haven’t. So much I wish I’d known earlier… #coolmumclub
So true. We still have lots of time though! Thank you for reading x
Gosh I almost feel guilty about the reading and the homework. Of course, we did it because first (and only child) we didn’t know any better. And the maths! We’ve now had a turnaround just like you. And as we approach the last week of primary school forever, I feel very pleased that we shall take with us all of the best bits. We have been very lucky with the school, I have to say. And as for the playground gang, well. We get to choose now. My choice is to spend it with those that we want to. Because we don’t do enough of that do we. Lovely Liz #tweensteensbeyond
Thank you Nicky. I hear of so many people who loved Primary school and that’s fantastic! I think I just wasn’t ever cut out for the whole idea of school life… I wish I’d been a blogger back then and could have found the support etc that was out there but hey!
Good luck with the secondary school journey, exciting times ahead! Can’t wait to hear all about it! Liz x
It’s funny that the world over we are agonising over the same issues. Like you I have sacrificed valuable family time on the times tables and ridiculous number games in a vain attempt to get my daughter to be more comfortable or rather more able at maths. I have done the same with my son over English forcing him to read. I have done the bullying on numerous occasions and dealt with an array of playground mums. It’s all in a day’s work of being a parent but oh my goodness how tiring it is. At 50 and looking back over my son’s education particularly as he is now moving on, I wish I had known just how exhausting it would be but that it would all come good in the end, because it does. #TweensTeensBeyond
That’s such a lovely comment Jo and something we should all remember… It all comes good on the end. It’s the toughest job in the world isn’t it? Thanks so much for reading x
Is it possible to drink a blog post? I literally drank in every word of this. My eldest starts school in September and I held my breath as I read about bullying and the being “slow” in areas. It terrifies me that I honestly don’t know how I’ll handle it… and I’m staring down the barrel of the big 4-0. But this has helped enormously to read. Thank you. For linking to #DreamTeam, and just for writing it. It’s brilliant. xx
What a gorgeous comment, thank you so much. Oh! I hope I didn’t frighten you. Please rest assured that of all the people I knew, none of their kids were bullied, not one. I’d like to think that now I’m older I would know better I really would, but there are things I do on a regular basis that I just know for a fact I’ll look back and think ‘you idiot! What was the point of THAT!!’ I suppose that’s life isn’t it? I’m so glad we are all going through the same things. It makes it more bearable. Thanks my lovely for the comment and can’t wait to hear about school starting! Liz x
Thanks Liz, and no don’t worry, you didn’t frighten me, but you definitely gave me a good dose of Mummy power ready for what’s to come. Thank you xx
Oh gosh I remember feeling pretty invincible in my thirties, which I spent mostly pregnant or breast-feeding. I think it must have been all those maternal hormones, I seemed to breeze through it. I feel so much more vulnerable now that I am approaching fifty! This is such a well-written account. The best bit was ripping up the paper that says that they are slow at something and flushing it down the toilet! I absolutely loved that! Thanks so much for sharing with us at #TweensTeensBeyond
Thank you! Lucky you, I was ok in my 20s but then it all started to go a bit wobbly! Thanks for your comment xx
My eldest starts school next year and I’m already so nervous about it (for both me and her!!). So glad you wrote this though, I’m feeling a little more prepared now I know what you wish you’d known! Thank you for sharing with #bigpinklink x
Thank you Hannah Jane! x
I just love your writing – you’ve nailed it again with humour and such heartfelt sincerity, that I’m thinking OMG that is me, you are me and my child was that child who hated being left at school while I tried to brush it over with inane sing songy chit chat, while wondering why my child couldn’t be the robust, go get it kid that all the others seemed to be as they raced into school loving it. And the patronising mothers who’d look smugly and say “AW, is she really not enjoying it then. Little Katie’s just loving it.” And I’d feel sh*t but so wrongly feel cross that my child wasn’t like little Katie. I now embrace my children and realise that they are the special ones. I also wish I’d never wasted so much time with the shallow parents who were never going to be my friends. I cringe at how hard I tried but they weren’t getting my humour (maybe it’s a bit crap!) and why didn’t they want to talk about fancying the presenters on CBeebies..it was only a joke! But like you, I finally found the ones who did and I’m pretty sure they’re lifelong friends. And as for the homework….aaaaah! Such a waste of time. And the teachers telling you so and so is struggling at the age of 6 or 7, I mean, really? Love this so much. #CoolMumLinky
This is such a wonderful post, full of food for thought for someone whose daughter is just about to start kindergarten. I hope I manage to follow your advice! When I look back it seems to me that my twenties and most of my thirties were a series of inexplicably bad decisions. In a few years time I’ll probably be wishing I’d spent more time doing things I really wanted to do and less time in the kitchen! #TwinklyTuesday
Thank you for your comment Ruth! She’s still so young, how wonderful. Yes! You in the kitchen and me with my lawn mower ?
This is brilliant. We are not up to the school years yet, but I love what you said about your child still being yours. Yes, we must certainly make decisions based on what is right for our family without getting stuck in school protocol.
Great post. Maybe we should all relax a little and let our children be themselves.