My desire to indulge in some yoga came out after I witnessed the perfect family in India.
Perfect kids, perfect Mother. I concluded that this must surely be a result of partaking in either a) dancing around the full moon naked, b) drinking lots of wine or else 3) taking regular yoga classes.
I couldn’t do the first without being reported to the police by my teenagers, the second was proving impossible in India and so that left the yoga.
Something I’ve been threatening to do for years but have somehow always talked myself out of it.
After having just spent two weeks in Gokarna, where it seems that every woman and her soul mate is super chilled out and zenned up to their eyeballs, I decided that when we got to Rajasthan, I too would head to the yoga studio.
Like all of these other women.
Get me some of this super magic bendy body mind power that these Mother Earth women are raving about. Then I would surely be perfect and kind, and my kids might decide that they hate their phones and would stop asking me to buy them Nutella.
Why not I thought. Go for it, Liz. You’re never too old to try something new after all.
I first witnessed the perfect yoga family seated at the table next to us at the only decent restaurant in Gokarna.
The family, who had probably come from the Netherlands. They’re all weird and hippy-like from there.
The perfect family who had trekked across the desert and through a jungle with just a leather thong between their toes and a pendant around their necks containing Buddha’s eye to lead them.
To me.
In India.
Me.
And the kids and Brian.
Sitting next to us in the cramped, hot and hectic restaurant I could tell from the outset that they were a family who never argued. Or even talked loud. They just whispered. And if this family were to ever raise their voices above two decibels, it would be for a jolly good reason. It would be to preach about the goodness of being vegan or the benefits of bathing in Almond milk and cow wee.
The family that only see the beauty in the world and vegetables and untreated soil. And cowpats.
The family born in Tranquilum.
I wanted so much to be that family.
I cannot keep complimenting you and gushing about how much you make me laugh… people will talk, but you know what?……I don’t care, you are bloody brilliant and I can’t waig for the next one!!❤️❤️❤️
Don’t ever stop reading or telling me you are enjoying them! I think its only you reading them!! xx
I am in stitches once again Lizzie. your writing is super and I love to read it .. keep them coming .. they uplift me xx
Thank you Les 🙂 You are my number one fan xx Anything that makes you smile is fabulous xxx
Liz! You are hilarious! I am loving reading your blog. Thank you for brightening my morning! X Christabel
Ah, you are lovely Christabel, thank you! x
Omg! Totally hilarious. Cannot wait for the next one. I’ve seen those “zen” families too, but it usually drives me to gin, not yoga lol. I love the way you tell the story. ?
Thank you Peggy. Yes, I think you are right. Gin is a much better option!! Thanks for your comment x
We just spent 6 months living 2 minutes from a wondrous yoga place in Hoi An. I vowed to go. Unlike you, I have yoga-d before and yoga-d often, but did I go…NO. Why, because in Vietnam there is wine and yoga was at whine time, whereas running can be done at any time without fixed schedules. Therefore I ran. Take up running instead.
I haven’t run for a long time Alysun…Don’t know if the old sports bra will play sport to me jiggling around in Vietnam! x
Absolutely brilliant! Hahaha…..perhaps settle for the rum and coke after all? Kids eh? That perfect family must have been Dutch…definately. They are on every holiday we go on too…. ?
Liz you are a bloody hysterical writer! Kids kept asking me why I was snorting and grinning at my phone. Can relate to all of it, except the flute thankfully, never experienced that. Loving your alternative India experience!!!
Thank you, Hannah! Sounds as though you are loving Bali! Hope to catch up with you there soon x
I’ll have to start reading your posts in daytime instead of nighttime, Liz! I’m laughing so hard, I’m waking up the whole family. And if the smallest wakes again, I’ll have to get the rum and coke menu too!!
There’s nothing like a rum and coke at 3am is there Szilvia?! Thank you for your comment! x
Hi Liz, my name is Mohit, I am from India but currently studying in Belgium. Loved your writing, it was so funny and I really admire what you guys are doing, specially for your kids, I am pretty sure they will turn out to be amazing human beings. Wish you all the best for all your future endeavors 😀
Hi Mohit! You found my bog post diaries! Thank you so much for your comment and for the reassurance on the kids! They are amazing teenagers and so am confident that they will grow into gorgeous adults. I hope so, that way they will look after me when I am old…
Enjoy Belgium! Beautiful country! x
what the heck he just kicked you out.
Did you go back the next day?
I would of asked why and not screamed like you thought of but it works lol.
Ps I love its a drama
Thank you Dean 🙂
I just found this website and have been bingeing your bog diaries. When I got to the pied piper part of this one I couldn’t stop laughing—I was tearing up! Seriously your humor is genius. Can’t wait to read more! Happy to be here, from the states! 🙂
Oh Cecilly!Thank you so much for this lovely, kind comment – you don’t know how much I needed to hear that right now…I am in the throes of writing a book (based on the Bog diaries) and each day I have to try and ignore the voice in my head that says”no-one will want to read this…blah, blah, blah). So you can imagine what getting this comment meant to me. 🥰
I’m not sure how you came across the ‘Bog Diaries’ part of my site (I don’t promote it at the moment) but I am so glad that you did!
I notice that you are not on my private email list? This is a weekly email that contains my most provocative material and is only available to subscribers. If you like the Bog Diaries you will LOVE these emails. I’d love for you to sign up, the link is here (or if you would like me to add you manually I am happy to do that for you too – just because you have made my weekend ☺️)
https://itsadrama.com/bookemail/
Thank you again Cicilly from the States, I really appreciate you reaching out!